1. Get on the same page

When throw­ing around ideas and plans for your wed­ding cer­e­mo­ny (and Wed­ding Vows specif­i­cal­ly), al­ways make sure to end on the same page. Go­ing ahead and de­cid­ing to write your own vows with­out ask­ing your part­ner can be a source of stress or ten­sion — es­pe­cial­ly if the oth­er per­son is­n’t good at that type of thing! It’s won­der­ful to have com­plete­ly unique and ro­man­tic vows, but not if it’s not com­ing from a place of love and ex­cite­ment.

2. Get In­spired!

Don’t be afraid to use some fun, ro­man­tic tools to get in­spired — wether it’s old love notes, love songs, pho­tos, or even a cheesy chick flick. Not every­one can chan­nel their in­ner Shake­speare with the drop of a hat, it’s okay to “set the mood” to get the cre­ative juices flow­ing!

3. Start off with a tem­plate

Just be­cause you did­n’t write it, does­n’t mean you can’t make it your own. There are TONS of beau­ti­ful­ly writ­ten wed­ding vows on­line to look through! Think of it as a build-a-vow work­shop — you can al­ways take cer­tain pas­sages or phras­es from ones you love, or ed­it them to be com­plete­ly orig­i­nal and unique to you both.

4. Get it all out

Writ­ing some­thing that con­tains such im­por­tance and sig­nif­i­cance can be dif­fi­cult, es­pe­cial­ly if you’re say­ing it for a crowd. Start out by writ­ing down any­thing that comes to mind about your part­ner that you love — how you met, their hob­bies, a fun­ny sto­ry, etc. Writ­ing it out can help you de­cide what you tru­ly want to in­clude in your vows, and un­time­ly what you want to say.

5. Re­flect, Re­lax, Re­peat

Writ­ers block is nor­mal — don’t fret! Just re­mem­ber to breath and re­lax. If it helps, take a walk or do some­thing mind­less. You’d be sur­prised by the great thoughts and ideas that will come to your mind when you’re not di­rect­ly fo­cus­ing on it!

6. Make it You

Writ­ing your own vows means… the pos­si­bil­i­ties are end­less! This is your time to be as cre­ative, fun, unique, cheesy, ro­man­tic as you want. Don’t wor­ry about who will be there or how it will sound — these vows are about you both, as a cou­ple.

7. Have Fun

Re­mem­ber: this is a cel­e­bra­tion! Al­though there are se­ri­ous el­e­ments to wed­dings, it is ul­ti­mate­ly a cel­e­bra­tion of your love. Don’t stress about hav­ing the EXACT per­fect way to say “I love you” to your part­ner, it is al­ways, al­ways, al­ways the thought that counts. These vows should come from your heart, so just say what you feel and don’t wor­ry about the rest!

8. When all else fails… K.I.S.S.

A per­fect rule to live by: Keep It Sim­ple Stu­pid! If you find your­self fever­ish­ly writ­ing a mil­lion things down, scratch­ing things out, and fran­ti­cal­ly scram­bling on the per­fect thing to say — take a mo­ment and stop. Some­times the most mov­ing thing you can say can be summed up in three words: “I love you”. When all else fails, keep your vows short and to the point!