On our wed­ding day, I made a choice. It was the most im­por­tant and sig­nif­i­cant choice of my life and I made it on­ly af­ter a great deal of con­sid­er­a­tion. On that day, I chose you to be my husband/wife. I thought then that such a de­ci­sion, once made, as fi­nal and ir­rev­o­ca­ble. Now I know that the se­lec­tion of a life part­ner is not a one-time de­ci­sion but an on-go­ing process. Many times in the years since then, I have cho­sen you again. Faced with changes and al­ter­na­tives, I have be­come keen­ly aware that a mar­riage lasts on­ly so long as both part­ners de­sire each oth­er above all oth­ers. As our lives have been af­fect­ed by the ebb and flow of oth­er lives and events, there have been many times when I could have cho­sen to go in a dif­fer­ent di­rec­tion. I did not. The rea­son is sim­ple: no oth­er per­son has ever aroused in me the feel­ings of ten­der­ness, joy and car­ing which you elic­it. I elect to stay with you not be­cause I feel ob­lig­at­ed to meet your needs but be­cause you con­tin­ue to meet mine. I live with you not be­cause a le­gal doc­u­ment says that I am your wife/husband but be­cause, in my heart of hearts, I still want to be by your side more than I want to be any­where else.